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lyrics to "Should Confusion" by Brandon Patton

all lyrics copyright 2002 Merlin Pool Music

 

Counting the Paces:

Help me
Everything feels like a sham
I don't know who the hell I am
And no one can tell I'm alone
Help me
I feel like I'm covered in sand
I've got to get out of this mood
I don't have a vine I can hold on to.

It's like every time I defeat myself
Into the ring now I'm choosing the weapon
No, no, no, don't shoot

Help me
Everything's crumbling down
I feel like a bug on the ground
So stepped on by accident
Stuck on you
Please whatever I said I don't mean it
This is my worst now you've seen it
Calmly just put down the shoe

It's like every time I defeat myself
Into the ring now I'm counting the paces
No, no, no, don't shoot

Can't we just be free?

I wish I could take more time to savor
Thoughts
And reflect
But it all is
Flowers outside of the bullet train
Here comes
One of those tunnels again
Where nobody could see it coming
Caught by surprise and you
Hold
Your
Breath

It's like every time I defeat myself
Into the ring now I'm counting the paces
No, no, no, don't shoot

What's the worst that could happen?

Yesterday falls away like it always does
It's so late
And we know that we'll both be busted
In a while
When we go back home
I don't care
It was all worth it

Had to sit through a long winded reprimand
Threw a fit, slammed a door, it was all pretend
Not much left I was allowed to do
But sit and think about you

Not a shock to be grounded
Their suspicions are well founded
What's the worst that could happen?
Meet me at the underpass tonight
I'll be waiting

Everyone's wondering where you were this week
The softball team needs you back, it's a losing streak
Carol called me to say stay away from you
What's going on?

I didn't know how it was for you until
Later on when I overheard Michelle
Tell her friends what your Dad did to you

Not a shock to be grounded
Their suspicions are well founded
What's the worst that could happen?
What's the worst that could... happen?


Mo Song

Standing on a gray milk crate by the smokers
Outsidewalkcoffeeshop
Look at me! I can balance it on one side
If I broke my ankle would you carry me home
If I wiped out and fell like Brent
Remember when his trick knee threw him to the cement?
We were picking sidewalk out of the pizza
Playing cards with your boyfriend while you listened to Fleetwood Mac
And you smoked another pack, and I say

Mo, please don't put your cigarette out on your shoe cuz it burns your soul

I'm getting drunk on your stories again, your words are like gin, make
me feel smart and content
But tell me again because I forget
She liked a him, and a him liked she, best friend threw a party so they could meet,
But then stole him for herself, so she got revenge with her ex-boyfriend
They'll never talk again

You can't help it you're a sensitive girl
And that's a vulnerable trait in this dangerous world
So I'm just looking out for your back when I say

Mo, please don't put your cigarette out on your shoe cuz it burns your soul

Let's go to the woods I'll bring the goods
You find a spot We'll sit on the moss
I hope someone remembers where the path is
I'm pretending to be lost

Went to take a piss on a Redwood tree
Old burned up thing, I said I hope you're not dead
He started shaking his leaves
He said you little spring chicken with your dick in your hand
Isn't life grand? I've been through the forest fire and drought
You can never figure out shit plays out
But have no doubt what you give is really what you get
Thank you for the water and I'm glad we met
And watch what you do with those cigarettes, and I say

Mo, please don't put your cigarette out on your shoe cuz it burns your soul


3100 miles

Look at all the people
on the train
rubbing their eyes
not saying anything
Got your headphones on
and you missed your stop again

Get there half an hour late
wear a comatose face
leave an inkblot on the space
below the words time in
slip in round the back,
crawl under your desk,
and then, wait to turn
the punch card clock back to seven

Come on in, have a drink, heave a sigh of relief
Are the television fed and fear led sheep still trying
to reprimand you, well
Did you get accused of treason
stopped and searched
for no good reason
Sit down and let us understand you
Turn the key ignite
Now you're moving at the speed of light
Can you tell me what the world looks like
Wide eyed and desire free
Like a DJ, spin a joyful sound
Don't let the cop cars bring you down
Hide with your records and the girls on E
Wait to see how much the fine is

The brightest stars can fade, and drift away...

3100 miles apart

And I can see... you in black
When you were young and thin,
Sifting through the record bins in the back and spying
And I walk in, and you can't help trying
To manuever over to my aisle and
Get a better look at what I'm buying
Can this really be true
Is there someone else like you
Who not only knows that band but has the early 45s to prove it
Flustered, and a simple, "hey,"
Is all that you can muster up the strength to say
You should hear the bootleg of their show in May
Float home slowly cuz you got the digits

The brightest stars can fade, and drift away...

3100 miles apart

Turning off one by one
Bedroom lights on the hill go black
Romance lost sleeping back to back and
Turning on
the television
Blue flickering lights the mission
Another insomniac is
Searching for the faith that he must've lost
And a show he can stand to watch
As he has another pint of ice cream
Cursing old mistakes and a dream
deferred
Another night without you
And then it's morning

Did That All Before

We could take this setting sun
to its natural conclusion
have a little bit of bedroom fun until we
collapse from exhaustion
we could fall in love against our will
kidney punch each other til we've had our fill and then
look back with regret
fight over the dining set
wish that we had never met

but you know, I did that all before

We could grab a coffee and sit
Impress each other with our clever wit
Eat desserts, make suggestive moans
Talk about passion just to set the tone
We could fall into our usual roles
Think we understand each other's deepest souls and then
Do the moth and flame
realize we're not the same
Get our wings singed again


but you know, I did that all before


We could turn each other into gods
praise our luck in love against all odds,
two peas in a pod
We could scrape away our dirty pores
Til we bumped against our solid cores and
Found ourselves exposed
Diametrically opposed
but you know

I did that all before


Auspicious Moment


Sitting in class face is like glass and I know I'm an ass when he calls me to answer
I stumble around, mumbling words, only buzzing like birds and I can't understand her
I'm wondering if girls are thinking about me
Imagining worlds where clothes are not on me
The teacher demands I talk about history but my time is stuck in the swirls of your mystery so

No, I don't know the answer
And no, I have no retention
I can't pay attention, in the spring
Whjen the girls are out on the green
And the summer dresses cover my head when I try to think

Give me a smile give me a wink hormones on fire and I'm on the brink
The window's ajar and she's down below I gaze from afar knowing she'll never know though
I'm wishing that she was returning my stare
winking and wording and wanting me there
Head in her[my] lap as she plays with my hair
Never a thought of domestic affairs and

Chorus

When I try to think
When I try to think I think of the sun I think of tan bodies I think of bear legs
I think of your eyes I think of your toes I think of the freckles dotting your nose
I think abouts lips never chapped, maps of your hips and picnics and blankets and grapes
I think about touch I think about talk I think about sex and nothing much else
Besides I think I am shallow and thin, endorfins are sweet but I'm giving in so
Fail me, my good man, I'm feeling young.

Another Chorus


Everybody Loves You Now

Feel like a lazy good for nothing
Since it's been becoming clear
That you've tired of me and you're planning
To get the hell out of here
I stare at my breakfast cereal
Til the flakes know how I feeyul
I'm an undesired meal headed for the drain


Isn't it ordinary fallin for someone like you
Isn't it ordinary I'm one of the chosen few
I was there first when nobody knew
It was my curse believing in you
I helped you burn all the bad reviews,
but everybody loves you now

When it brushes you the touch of my skin has an effect
Not unlike a mop
I feel as Sexy as two kids at the drive in
Parked next to a cop
I don't want to bring it up
I just want you to stay
There's a conflict here
That I'm trying to steer clear
Like a deer on a dark freeway
I don't know what to say

Chorus

Solo

I just want to move you babe like old times
But now you say you hate poetry that rhymes
You dunk me! You make your splash! In the pond
A stepping stone for you to keep traveling on
Your mind is closed like a bouncer's fist
You stole all my songs and took me off the guest list
Now I'm left without a ticket to your sold out shows
Hiding from the bouncer with a broken nose
Didn't even get to bow after the curtain closed

The Good Life


She's beside and far away
I've been making plans today
Plans to work and pay the rent
It's amazing how the time gets spent
She could say a word or two
I might even hear it
She could say I'm leaving you
I could say whatever did I do

She's the lover of my dreams
Dreams I used to have and savor
But now the real thing is achieved
And I am only wishing
That I was more alone
You don't get anything for free
And if you ever hope to keep it
The only freedom you get easily is the
freedom to abuse it

And if your saddle is your guilt
Then your mount is cannon fodder
And I hate to beat a dead horse that I
Should've led to water

(Guitar solo)

She's doing what she does
I'm being what I was
I'm hoping for a chance
You know, sometimes I feel I never really get a chance
I'm lying at her feet
Begging her to never leave
And as she packs her things
I realize the begging was a dream
I never told her one damn thing

I'm going to break my heart
But never break the cycle
All I want's a taste of water from the good life
All I want is easy love
And I am reaching through my handcuffs
I am holding out my hands cupped
But I never get my hands up to my mouth in time
The water always slips right through my fingers

Someday

Someday when we're old
Aching in our bones
Talking of beliefs and hopes that we've outgrown
I will turn to you and smile and you will ask me why
I'm remembering the times that we made love and cried
I'm remembering your face, the way you looked so long ago

Coffee heats the cream swirling in your cup
What sinks in the mind later rises up
You are watering petunias when the memory comes
Just a smell, at first familiar, like a distant drum
Then it opens into more
The trees, the farm
You are swinging in your uncle's arms
You were light enough to ride his shoulders, long ago

When you start to shake I'll tie your shoes
When your vision fades I'll read to you
Hoping I don't die before you do

Someday when we're old, comfort I will find
Losing names and times, trapped inside my mind
When I think of how you didn't see me make my move
When I kissed you for the first time in my old bedroom
You were staring at the floor
I turned around
And our foreheads made a hollow sound
But we shook it off and tried again, so long ago